Tuesday, May 13, 2014

It's Time

I had this dream that one day I would have one of my book projects published. But more and more I have messed with this blog and short stories that do nothing to reach that goal.

I have decided to stop writing for public consumption until I have a publishable work completed. To that end I will stop writing daily blogs and concentrate full time on completing a book project.

The angry typewriter will be put out to pasture

I have grown as a writer by doing this blog and my work here has translated positively into my other projects. Your feedback has helped me with that process.
I want to thank everyone who has read my rants, ravings, tripe and sometimes idiocy. You all have been a wonderful audience and I appreciate every read I have been lucky enough to get.
There is a line, from an old baseball movie, "There comes a time when you have to stop doing what you need to do and start doing what you were meant to do."
I truly believe that I was meant to finish a book project. Whether it is ever published or not dos not matter. I just need to finish.
Take care my friends. It has been a pleasure entertaining you.

Friday, May 9, 2014

<º))))><.•´¯`•. FLASH DANCERS .•´¯`•.><((((º>

Flash dancing was a form of tap dance evolved in 1920s-1930s which combined dance with acrobatics. Flash Dancers of Second Life are much more than a group that gets together and dances. They are a re-occurring phenomenon of friendship, support and fun that can be seen all over the Second Life grid.

I am coming up on my first year anniversary as a member of this group. Honestly, after my illness last year Second Life had lost most of its fun for me but last June the Flash Dance group started to put the fun back into my Second Life experience.

I love Second Life music. There are some wonderful performers available every night all over the grid. But standing at a show listening to music, no matter how good it may be, gets boring when you are doing it alone. Flash Dance gives people the opportunity to enjoy the music with people that quickly become friends. The banter in group chat is fun and adds to the experience.

But Flash Dance is much more than a group of friends dancing, listening to music and chatting. They offer support to music venues by bringing large numbers of dancers into the venue. They offer support, and this is one of my favorite things, to performers that do not necessarily draw large crowds to their shows. They consciously look for new performers and support them through show patronage.

This is one group you should join. I guarantee that you will enjoy Second Life more when in the company of the Flash Dance Group. Ask any group member about the group. You will be pleasantly surprised at how much fun they will bring into your day.

If you like music. If you like to dance. Then this is the group for you. 1150 Second Lifers can not be wrong.

Randy(Zoilo Brando)

Thursday, May 8, 2014

The Sock Monkey Monologues~~Reefer Madness

I caught Felix, my naughty sock monkey, smoking pot with Babbette last night. I found them in a smoke filled daze with Twinkie wrappers and potato chip bags all around them.

I have noticed a change in how Felix has been dressing. I believe he is having an identity crisis. First I noticed him and Babbette listening to reggae and then I saw him head out of the house looking like this;

Oh where has my little monkey gone?
It seems like it was only yesterday that he was a young carefree monkey happy to hang around the house and pal around with me.
I blame myself. I believe that while I thought he was sleeping he was actually awake and looking over my shoulder watching Dexter and Breaking Bad.  It's no wonder that when I asked where he wanted to go  on vacation this summer he enthusiastically said "Colorado".
Babbette is starting to look a little rough too.
Babbette after a night of partying.

This is a serious situation. I have started looking for a Sock Monkey Rehab.

I wonder which rehab Rob Ford, the Toronto mayor, is residing. I want to avoid that one. That guy is NUTS.


Wednesday, May 7, 2014

The Destructive Power Of Good Intentions

"Life is short and if you're looking for extension, you had best do well. 'Cause there's good deeds and then there's good intentions. They are as far apart as Heaven and Hell", Ben Harper

The 'War on Poverty' is fought with good intentions. The 'War on Drugs' is fought with good intentions. Food Stamps, affordable health care and welfare are presented with good intentions. Prohibition was passed with good intentions. And yet all produced varying degrees of failure.

I see one reoccurring theme in all these programs that are full of  'good intentions'; DEPENDENCY.

Each of the programs mentioned above have and are continuing to produce a dependent society with citizens that are becoming incapable of taking control of their own lives. People who are incapable of taking responsibility for their own existence.

All of us, at some point in  our lives, need some help. It's normal and natural to find oneself in situations that require us to seek assistance. I am no exception to that rule. But assistance should be sought and given on a temporary basis with those being assisted steered in a direction where they can take control of their lives.

The production of generations of dependent people has been eroding away at the foundations of American society for decades. If this country ever falls it will be from forces within not external enemies.

"I believe there are more instances of the abridgment of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power, than by violent and sudden usurpation's", James Madison.

This governmental usurping of the fabric of American society is a calculated attempt, by those who hold power, to control the direction of this country for their own purposes. They camouflage these acts in programs that make dependent zombies out of the populace. When a program fails we hear the constant banging of the good intentions drum and we are all expected to to dance to that beat.

This country was built on the individuality of each of  its citizens. It was built by men and women who understood the value of personable responsibility and taking control of our own lives. These people still exist scattered among the dependent zombie apocalypse caused by political and religious agendas.

Wrestling control from those living inside the beltway will take much work.

Three things are needed to turn the tide on dependency. First, we need to elect individuals who will govern with the people's best interests in mind and not what is best for their re-election. Second, we need the stomach to make the sacrifices necessary to pull ourselves up to lives that are as independent as possible from government. Third, we need the heart to help our neighbors when they are in need and not send them off to deal with the government bureaucracy for assistance.

We have dug ourselves a very deep hole and climbing out will take a lot of sacrifice, pain and energy. Independent responsible lives are not beyond our reach. We are Americans and we can do anything we set our minds to.


Tuesday, May 6, 2014

The Sock Monkey Monologues

Monologues are just not for vagina's anymore. Felix the Sock Monkey has begun a running dialogue about his adventures. He, along with his girl friend Babbette, has joined a soccer team, 'The Monkey Balls'.

It's a unisex team. As Felix always says "Unisex is better than no sex at all". The upside to this is that Felix and Babbette are having loads of fun. The downside is I have to drive them to practice and games. It's a huge responsibility.

They are quite good players. Don't tell Felix this but Babbette is a much better player. She is kicking his balls all over the field, lol.

They do look cute in their uniforms.
Their next game is against a team made up of stuffed zebras. I do not think it's fair as the zebras claim that they have four feet which makes it sock monkeys 22 feet and zebras 44 feet. I have filed a protest to force the zebras to only play with their hind legs.
Felix and Babbette are showing no fear in the light of their numerical limb deficiency.
They are quoted as saying, " Look Rain, I can play with no hands".

Political Correctness Is Not Funny

It's true, political correctness is not funny. But political incorrectness is freaking hilarious. There is no fodder for jokes in being PC. Jokes and cartoons that are politically incorrect are funny.

I am not talking about hate speech. I am talking about jokes told by professionals.

A joke that starts with 'a Rabbi, a Priest and a Baptist Minister go into a bar' would not be funny if told as 'three nondescript religious people go into a bar'. I think that the entertainment industry may be the only place where political correctness can be left at the door.

Now that's funny!!!
We need to learn to laugh at ourselves again. When did Americans get this thin skin that ha them being hurt by words. Growing up the only time words hurt me was when my father used them to call me closer to him so he could beat that tar out of me for doing something stupid.

I do not think that comedians should have to apologize for politically incorrect jokes they tell. THEY ARE JOKES!!!

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $900. $400 for materials, $400 for my crew, and $100 profit for me." The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700. $300 for materials, $300 for my crew, and $100 profit for me." The Chicago contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$2,700." The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?" The Chicago contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence." "Done!" replies the government official. And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work.



Laugh at yourselves kiddies. Life is to short to allow every little joke hurt you.

Unless the person telling the politically incorrect joke is also coming at you with  machete while telling it; I think you will live.


It's Sinko De Mayo

This story just in from my home town news organization.

 "The celebration of Sinko De Mayo can be traced to the War of 1812 when the British sank a ship full of mayonnaise of the coast of Mexico. The name 'Sinko De Mayo' has been bastardize to 'Cinco DE Mayo'. The Beer Cartel ran with this celebration so they could sell beer in buckets of five colds beers on ice and the liquor industry jumped on the ship to sell margaritas. This is why even today Mexicans don't like mayonnaise ...its either red or green salsa."

Sinko De Mayo

Please remember that my home town newspaper reported the moon landings as a hoax and was instrumental in instilling fear into peoples lives when they reported that Orson Well's 'War of the Worlds' broadcast was genuine.


Friday, May 2, 2014

They Grow Up Way To Fast

I have been concerned about Felix the Sock Monkey's behavior over the past week. He has been sneaking out of the house about 3am and not returning until around 7am. No explanation about the nocturnal escapades and even when I asked him to stop he sort of gave me that look teenagers give their parents that translates to, "You do not know anything". I have been more than a bit worried.

So last night I waited for him to sneak out and followed him. He went 4 houses down the block and went to the back of the house. I peaked in the backyard and found him snuggled up with a female sock monkey named Babbette. I had seen her around the neighborhood. She was older and more experienced.

I was no sure whether to act like a proud dad or concerned because I had not had the 'TALK' with Felix yet. I leaned toward concerned.
At breakfast this morning I decided that I needed to have the 'talk' as soon as soon as possible so I pulled Felix aside and had that talk.
Using illustrations from the Sock Monkey Kama Sutra I covered as much as possible until his head was swimming in information. Then I sent him off to think about all we had talked about.

I hope he learned something. I gave him some protection and lent him the car for a date tonight. 



Thursday, May 1, 2014

The Job Hunt Has Begun Again

"Sixty five year old man, over educated, physically recovering from an illness and willing to do just about any job seeks a part time position to supplement his social security and meager pension."

HMMM!! This guy is ferkered, lol.
Sixty five years of educating myself and a good work history means little in today's job market. The unemployment rate where I live is around 10% and most of the available work requires a strong back not brain. A glance at my back reminds me that it has seen better days.

Add to that a past criminal record, even a very old one, and getting an interview is a doubtful exercise.

I am not a greedy man. All I want is to add about $100/week to my income. Just to make things a little more comfortable.

When I am filling out applications I can see it in their eyes; 'he is so old' or 'we need a younger man'. Of course they can not tell me that so I hear things like, "you are over qualified". I wonder how many 'over qualified' people inhabit the skid rows of our country?

Since 2008 I have filled out over 100 applications, both in person and online, and in that time I managed to get one interview with McDonald's. A job I held until until I got sick and now they are not hiring locally.

Admittedly am limited by what I can do and I certainly am not making a living writing but there must be someone who needs a creative brain besides Dr. Frankenstein.

So for now my days are filled with my job quest. It is a long depressing process that I need to complete and will with Gods help.

I have been wealthy during my lifetime and was not happy. Strange as it may seem; I am happier struggling for every scarp I get then I was when I was well off. You learn to appreciate the little things and the need to have lots of possessions becomes meaningless.

So I will repeat; "Sixty five year old man, over educated, physically recovering from an illness and willing to do just about any job seeks a part time position to supplement his social security and meager pension."