There was a time that the thought of spending any holiday alone was repugnant to me but over the years my mind has changed. Of course it may just be that I am rationalizing my plight and protecting my psyche but I do have my reasons for accepting my solitude.
Divorce not only separates families physically but it destroys the traditions that were built as a family unit. Families, especially the children, make any holiday special but Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. It is a family day of course but more than that it is a day of reflection. It is the gateway to the Christmas Season.
I loved Thanksgiving with my family as it was always a peaceful day with little stress. So different when extended family are introduced into the day.
I remember having to worry about where people sat because some had ongoing feuds and scheduling dinner around football games because some family members thought Thanksgiving was a celebration of the NFL.
The menu always had to be changed to accommodate other peoples Thanksgiving traditions. One year I was sent out to look for pickled crab apples because having those was a Thanksgiving tradition for one of my brother-in-laws.
I hated exiling my children to the 'childrens table'. It was like they were being second class citizened when they should be the focus of why we were thankful.
If I see one more relative sit on my couch, open up his pants and complain that he had eaten to much while asking for more pumpkin pie I will scream.
On a day when we are supposed to be enjoying the company of family and reflecting on our lives I have seen more family arguments than there are on Amish Mafia. No subject was devoid of the potential for argument. Politics, sports, the food and aunt Mabel's massive boil on her ass that requires her to sit on four pillows so she can eat dinner are all thrown around, debated and produced arguments with someones feelings hurt and dinner ruined.
These days I spend a quiet day in solitude except for brief visits from my children to drop off food because they believe that I will starve if they don't, lol. My ex manipulates their holiday time through threats and whining so I never get to make a dinner at my place. The kids know that dad will not complain and it's easier for them to give in to mom than fight her.
This year, for the first time in probably seven years I am making a turkey dinner. Yeppers, I will be eating turkey for a week so I have been looking at recipes like turkey pot pie and turkey soup to use up the leftovers.. Simple things that I like.
In essence I will begin again to make my own holiday traditions. Like Grilled Turkey, Brie, and Apple Butter Sandwich with Arugula. Yummy!!
Have a wonderful holiday!!!