Publishers Clearing House gets a big yes from me. So does winning the lottery. But Kings County Bar in Brooklyn, NY, the city of my birth, is holding a 'smallest penis contest' and I want no part of it, lol. I am terrified I would win.
Per a media release, contestants will be judged in multiple categories, including "poise in both evening wear and bathing wear." In addition to a cash prize (which can optionally be donated to charity), a "wee crown and scepter" will be awarded to the less-endowed man best exhibiting "extraordinary heart, talent, and chutzpa."
The crown is small and the scepter is a magnifying glass. No Thank YOU!!
It would take a man with amazing self confidence to participate. I would not count myself within that category. An enormous ego, which I do possess, might get you through but I fear that ego would be crushed if you actually lost.
It is said, by those in the small penis community, that size does not matter or that it is how you stir the pot not the size of the spoon that matters. HMMM!! Have you ever stirred a pot with a tea spoon when the guy next to you is stirring it with a boat paddle?
If you happen to be in Brooklyn on June 14th stop by Kings County Bar and see the fun. I wont be there, lol.
Now how does this penis enlarging gizmo work?