Monday, September 23, 2013

Men Take Their Asses Into Their Own Hands

Brought to us by the same people that gave us the Dollar Shave Club, whose tag line is 'Our blades are not good they are F$$KING Great,  comes One Wipe Charlies, moist butt wipes for men. Yeppers men can now have asses as clean as women's. The era that will see the end of underwear tracks has arrived.

What a world we live in when men can have sweet smelling asses all day. Our attractiveness to women must go up when our collective asses are pampered with aloe vera and chamomile and left with a peppermint scent.

My butt is all a twitter with excitement. Finally I can feel clean from head to toe even when I have those unfortunate meetings in the bathroom at times of day that find me away from home. Damn that lunch time chili.

I plan on carrying my One Wipe Charlies in my back pocket, hanging out just enough to be recognized, so women know that my ass is pristine. OOOOOO I better buy extra condoms, lol.

I believe that good personal grooming is important to men's attractiveness so this is one more weapon in our arsenal.

But more is needed. Like a product that can be taken before bed that eliminates morning breath so that first kiss of the day is a pleasant one. Or bed sheets that absorb that uncomfortable cold wet spot that invariably appears under a woman and that I always roll over in after sex.

I am working on an invention I call 'The Romantic Comedy Clone' that you can substitute for yourself when a women wants you to watch a romantic comedy instead of the football game. Going to sell a million of those, lol.


PS... Go to the Dollar Shave Club website and watch the advertising videos. They are hilarious.

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