Saturday, May 26, 2012

Things I Hate and Could Do Without

Life is supposed to be lived! It is supposed to be fun! We have our ups and downs but for the most part we should be enjoying our lives. There will always be some of us that seem to be miserable every day. Luckily I do not fall in with that group. I generally go through life happily seeing my cup half full and not half empty.

Of course I have my moments, lol. There are things that set me off and get my blood boiling. Some are little in nature. Others are larger than life. Unfortunately most of them are reoccurring.

I only mention this because I am endeavoring to write more blogs on the happy or funny side and less of the ones that make me spit insults and vitriol at STUPID people.



Some of the things that I am trying to avoid to achieve my happy blog goals are:

~Stupid People~Very hard to do you say? Yes it is!!!!!  A simple trip to Wal-Mart will produce multiple sightings of the Species Peopleus Stupideous. I find the 4pm - 7pm time slot particularly entertaining and avoid it at all costs. I now shop at Wal-Mart around 5am when no one is around.

~The Internet News  New Catch Words~AOL News is especially grievous in this respect. Words like Outrageous, Massacre, Slams, Frightening and Surprising are used to draw people into stories that little substance or are non news. I have stopped reading any story that has any of those words in the title.

~Weather Reporters Covering Extreme Weather~You know the ones I mean? The reports that are mandatory whenever a hurricane comes ashore or a snow storm hits. The scene; weather person standing outside and near a beach. Usually in their hotel parking lot. Fighting hurricane force winds while trying to hold their hat on and telling us that its windy and raining. My God it's a hurricane dip shit!! Of course it's windy and raining. The Weather Channel is famous for these types of reports. Their 'hurricane experts' in the field at the slightest mention of a hurricane sighting. The funniest reports are the ones that are given while standing on a beach that the hurricane has missed. The hapless reporter showing us 2 foot waves and lamenting that the storm made land fall to the north of their position. Good luck for property owners and bad luck for their career.

~Tofu~The other day my neighbor, who tends to give me food and who I greatly appreciate, invited me to a dinner consisting of tofu with veggies. A good thought considering my recent health issues. I sat down with her and her husband and eat every bite she gave me. Even the seconds, lol. The veggies were wonderful but the tofu was something I try my best to avoid at all costs. It has no taste looks strange on the plate and they do not have a dog to slip it to when she was not looking. I particularly felt bad for her husband who had to sit there and eat it after a hard days work. The next day I took him out to eat at a 'country buffet' as a form of apology for the tofu.

There are so many more things that make me want to spit nails. In no particular order:

~Racism
~Homophobia
~Okra Boiled
~Neck Bones and Rice(WTF is up with that)
~Sweets Without Sugar(Is it really a sweet if it has no sugar)
~Seedless Watermelon(Takes the fun out of spiting the seeds for distance)
~Borrowing Someones Handicapped Sticker(I want instant jail time for this one)
~Low Fat Ice Cream(Whats the point!!!!!)
~Baseball Type Caps Turned Sideways(It just looks ignorant)
~Pants Worn So Low Underwear Shows(I actually saw a woman wearing pants like this last week)
~Multicolored Hair On Anyone I Have To Do Business With
~Drivers Seats Reclined So Far The Driver Is Practically Laying Down

God I could go on and on!!

Make your own list. I think you will be surprised at what you include.

Randy

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