Yes Kiddies; my darling Pippa Middleton lost 'Rear Of The Year Award'. And to a woman who I not only would not allow in my bed but one, in my opinion, would smash my bed with her BIG ASS. I am flabbergasted! I flummoxed! I am pissed off!!
I WANT A RECOUNT OF THE VOTES.
I WANT THE JUDGES CHECKED FOR POSSIBLE BRIBERY!
I WANT THERE EYES CHECKED FOR LEGAL BLINDNESS!
I WANT THEM TO HAVE A PSYCHOLOGICAL EXAMINATION!
Look at Pippa's Sweet Little Pillow Of Love!!! Such a pleasant site. One that brings to mind long hours spent in admiration of the beautiful women's form. Round, Soft, so Freaking Kissable!!
NOW LOOK AT THE SUPPOSED WINNER!! OMFG!! Where I am from in South Carolina we have a saying to describe this type of BUTT. It looks like 'Two Pigs In A Poke Fighting To Get Out'. For my Northern USA readers and those from other countries; a Poke is a Bag!!
I am literally sickened by this choice!! There had to be a group of Chubby Chasers or Big Ass Lovers on this Panel Of Judges.
My committees have been instructed to start a campaign of 'Innuendo and Falsehoods' about Carol Vorderman. Yes her name is Carol Vorderman~~the owner of the BIG AND PROBABLY WRINKLED ASS!!!!! I am going to make her life a living hell!!
I will not allow anyone to besmirch my Beautiful Pippa. 'My Quest For A Date With Pippa Middleton' continues with new vigor.
NEVER HURT MY WOMAN!! I WILL GET YOU IN THE END!!