Thursday, July 25, 2013

It's Official~~American Boobs Are Getting Bigger

A new survey by lingerie retailer Intimacy has discovered that the average 'bra size' in the United States has increased to 34DD up from 34BB 20 years ago. American men do not have to settle for a pitiful hand full anymore. A mouthful is now a meal and not a snack.

I would like to thank all those companies that hormone feed their livestock and pass the benefit of those hormones into the female anatomy. Like the company tag line says; "Eat More Chicken". In the next 20 years lets jump that number up to an eye popping 36DD.

I have a couple of disappointments with this information. First; that I was not included as a member of survey team. Those lucky smiling bastards, lol.

Secondly, that the infusion of hormones into our food supply has not increased penis size. Come on researchers get on the ball. Stop shafting men with hormones that do not pump up girth and length. While you are at it throw in some stamina hormones so we can present the most complete package possible.

Isn't it a wonderful world we live in; Bigger Boobs Through Chemistry.

I have already volunteered for the next boob survey and started amassing the necessary supplies. Lets see; exercise equipment for hand strength, lotions for hand softness and Viagra just in case I get lucky, lol.

Now I am off to lunch. I am looking for some penis enlarging harmone filled chicken, yummy.


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