Monday, June 18, 2012

When Do You Know That You Are Getting Old?

When Do You Know That You Are Getting Old? That is a question that jumped out at me this morning when I read that the Rolling Stones will retire in 2013 after fifty years of being together. That story was followed by one about Paul McCartney's 70th birthday party. I can remember when the Beatles and Rolling Stones first toured in the USA.

In Second Life, on Saturday, a friend passed me a wheelchair. I should have know that was a sign of old age as the rumor going around in Second Life is that I am about to celebrate my 101st birthday. In reality that is off be a few years, lol, but at times my knees feel every bit of 101.

The writing has been on the wall for awhile but I am to stubborn to admit it. All those emails I have been receiving about helping with balding and my erection are starting to hit home. When Friendly and I went on out Second Life honeymoon I packed 80 little blue pills and I needed every one of them to get me through the week. Damn that wheelchair would have come in handy when we got home, hehe.

There are some tell tale signs that I will share with you in the hopes that you will be equipped to deal with your oncoming 'matureness'.

You know you are getting old when,

Your spouse has more teeth than you but not as many as your last jack-o-lantern.

Those around you don't know the following TV shows; Petticoat Junction, Green Acres and Gomer Pile.

When you go to the doctors and they are all younger than you.

Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.

The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.

You feel like the morning after and you haven't been anywhere.

Your little black book contains only names that end in M.D.

Your children begin to look middle aged.

You finally reach the top of the ladder and find it leaning against the wrong wall.

Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet.

You look forward to a dull evening.

Your favorite part of the newspaper is "20 Years Ago Today."

You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.

I made that print larger so all you old bastards could read it, lol.

That Old Guy

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