Toilet Seat Covers~~WHY?

At an early age I discovered that God had not provided laser sighting for my penis. Getting up during the night to pee, which happens more frequently with age, causes all sorts of aiming deficiencies. Men forget to turn on the light and wait until they hear the sound of water on water before deciding that their aim is true. My problem has always been forgetting to lift the seat so I am peeing on the lid. Many times the words "Oh Shit" have been heard during one of my bathroom journeys.

So why do women insist that a toilet seat cover is a good idea?

It's like a shag carpet waiting to be peed on!!



When I was married I would toss these things in the washer almost daily. Especially when my son was potty training. The kid is smart as Einstein but has no aim at all. Maybe Einstein didn't have aim either.

I was also famous for losing toilet seat covers in the wash like men lose socks. Yes I was throwing them out, lol. But like clockwork a new one would appear to take its place. We always had ones that matched the decor. Nothing fun.

 

The Halloween Seat Cover 

I could finally get VIP Seating 

 The Seat Cover for after a Chili meal

 

Peeing on the kitties, Oh I am going to be hated for this one

 

Peeing on Sponge Bob

 

 

Toilet seat covers should be banned for sanitary reasons alone. One night, back in my drinking days, I wandered into the bathroom to pee, didn't lift the lid and peed on my cat who was sleeping on the lid. Hell I just thought the lid was furry. I never heard it purr, lol.

 

Randy