Have You Ever Tried To Manipulate Your Pussy

OK you pervs I am talking about your cats. Have you ever tried to get your cat to do something that you wanted. Good Luck With That! The term denoting a level of difficulty, 'it's like trying to herd cats', says it all when trying to manipulate your cat into doing anything that you want them to do.

Recent studies on the evolution of the cat's purr, done in the United Kingdom, have discovered that   there is an embedded frequency in the cat's purr that irritates humans but at the same time brings out a nurturing attitude in human cat owners.

Notice I said human cat owners. I have no idea if zombie cat owners are affected. I would think not as a cats purr would only incite a need for lunch in a zombie.

According to Jennifer Viegas, in an article dated February 1, 2011,  cats adore and manipulate women. Relationships between cats and their owners mirror human bonds, especially when the owner is a woman. Cats hold some control over when they are fed and handled, functioning very similar to human children in some households. While the age, sex and personality of owners affect these relationships, the sex of the cat doesn't seem to matter.

I guess this explains why we see so many cat ladies on the news being evicted from their houses because of cat over population and never seem to see men in this situation.

Now this is scary. In an article titled, 'A Parasite Found In Cats Could Be Manipulating Our Brains', Eric Goldshein reports that a long-buried, oft-derided theory is gaining traction in the medical world: cats are harboring a parasite that can manipulate human behavior and personality, sometimes to fatal ends.

This parasite, called Toxoplasma gondii, which is found in cat feces, can infect the human brain in a variety of ways. According to Mr. Goldshein the effects of T. gondii range from seemingly benign — it makes men more introverted and women more extroverted — to deadly, as it may contribute to schizophrenia or to slower reaction times that lead to car crashes. 

The author estimates that the death of up to One Million people a year may be attributed to the T. gondii parasite.

OK, to my point. I am living with this male cat. He does what he wants when he wants. Wanders the neighborhood acting like Don Juan and just about every kitten and young cat I see looks like him. He is 15 years old and seems to be getting stronger.

I am 65 years old and seem to be getting weaker. I believe that this freaking cat has infested me with the T. gondii parasite and is sapping my strength to use for his continued amorous adventures. I am falling asleep at 9 pm and the cat is getting all the action and then he has the nerve to bitch when I don't feed him on time.

If you do not hear from be for any extended length of time; have the cat arrested for murder by parasite.

Randy