Following the law can be a struggle at times. Bureaucratic Grid Lock can make a simple task harder than squeezing a size 12 girl into a pair of size 6 pants. You will get it down eventually but it is a painful task, both for the girl and her many assistants, and the end result is less than desirable.
My task on this beautiful Wednesday was to get my car registration renewed. Seems a simple task; go down to the Department of Motor Vehicles and hand over $28 and get my new sticker. I was so deluding myself when I left the house to get this down.
The cast of Characters for my adventure:
~~The DMV Personnel(3 of them)
~~My Insurance Company
~~The County Tax Office(2 employees and a manager)
~~A Motor Vehicle Inspection Station
~~A Fax Machine(with a mind of its own)
~~ME(The Human YOYO)
I arrived at a Motor Vehicle Inspection Station at 8 am and it took a little under an hour to finish the inspection and pass it. So Far So Good!!
Just after 9 am I enter the County Court House and pay the taxes on my car. Taxes have to be paid before registration can be done. This only took 15 minutes but it is where my problem began.
The machine that gives Receipts was broken down but I was assured by the person taking my payment that it will show in teh DMV computers as paid. So off I go to DMV about 2 blocks from the court house. It is now 9:45 am.
The DMV office is fairly empty so I am able to go directly to the counter. Happily giving the DMV Girl all my paperwork, sans tax Receipt. I am in anticipation of a quickly getting done and hitting IHOP on my way home.
But as the comedian John Pinette says, "Nay Nay", was my response from the clerk. It seems she was miffed by lack of a Tax Receipt. I explained the machines malfunction to her but she said, "We need a receipt in order to process the registration". It also seemed that the payment was not in the computer system as promise. So back to the Court House I go.
Now as my luck would have it, and with prospects of a good breakfast fading fast, I found that the person that I had taken my tax payment was out on break. I explained my situation to another clerk and was met with a confused look as her Receipt Machine was working. To add to the mess, Taxes are paid in cash and she had not record of my payment. I had to wait, until the first girl finished shoving her freaking McDonald's biscuit down her gullet, before I could proceed. It was now 10 am.
At 10:30 Chubby returned from Micky D's and took up my case. She told me the payment was in the computer and even showed me the posting. I asked if she could now give me a receipt. Her response, "My machine is still broken down". No one else wanted to give me a receipt either. So I asked to see a manager. It was 10:30 now.
The manager listened, spent 20 minutes trying to fix Chubbies machine and then at nearly 11 am gave me a hand written receipt. I really needed a drink badly!!!
Off to DMV I went with receipt in hand. Clerk #2 at DMV cleared all my tax paperwork and the says, "We need a form FS1 to prove that I had insurance on December 11, 2011. I did not need proof of insurance NOW,,but for almost a year ago. And the KICKER!! Only my insurance company can send it. They gave me a fax number and I settled into my car, grabbed my cell phone and called the insurance company.
At the insurance company I was met with, "No problem,,we will fax it right out,,,give us 10 minutes". I sat in my car reading for 30 minutes to make sure I had given them enough time to fax it. Then headed back in and was informed by Clerk #2 that it had not arrived. So back to the car and another phone call. "We faxed it",was my insurance companies retort.
My problem was that GEICO's fax makes 4 attempts to fax a document before giving up. The DMV's fax machine is very busy. See where this is going, lol.
They re faxed it. I waited another 30 minutes. AND NO ARRIVAL OF MY FORM!! Back to the car. Another phone call. Another 30 minutes. AND NO ARRIVAL OF MY FORM!!
So back to my car and another phone call. Another attempt to fax. I it was lunch time and I was hungry and pissed about missing my beloved pancakes. But I went and ate and the returned to the DMV. AND NO ARRIVAL OF MY FORM!!
Another phone call. Another 30 minutes of reading. And another walk back into the DMV. Just as the Clerk was telling me; AND NO ARRIVAL OF MY FORM, the fax went off and there it was.
I paid my fee and headed to a local PUB to drink the BUREAUCRACY out of my system.
I arrived home at 2:30 pm, over six hours after my adventure began.
Next year I will start my registration process in June in hope of completing it by my Due Date in September.
'When life gives you lemons ask for salt and tequila!', and that's what I did!!!!
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I want to thank Ms Tora Maven for providing me with a week of fantastic stories. Her work was read by nearly 400 people and in over 30 countries this week. Girl you are a HIT!!
I have 2 more stories from Tora that I will publish the next 2 consecutive Saturdays. Both are Real Life Experiences. Yummy!!
I look forward to having more of Tora's work here at Night Lines.
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Randy
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