Saturday, April 30, 2011

It's Saturday~~That Means All You Can Eat Pancakes And The Results!!

Yeppers!! Where I live Saturday morning means heading out for breakfast, to a pancake house, and getting your fill of pancakes for the week. Sounds extravagant? Sounds glutenous? No not at all. Because Saturday is also our big shopping day and we need every calorie that those scrumptious pancakes will provide so we can make it through the malls and grocery stores with enough strength to get home, eat lunch and collapse. Or in my case; slip into a bikini and begin tanning so that I actually look like I live at the beach and not in a freaking cave.


           I provide this picture because there is nothing cuter than Cats Wearing Thongs.


Early this morning I went out to my front porch, with my girlfriends 4 year old daughter, and retrieved the Official Mayonnaise Jar that helds the votes for 'Lana's Name That Cow Extravaganza". After a pot of coffee, and much urging from such a cute little girl, I opened the jar and tabulated the votes.

The winner with 62% of the vote is; (there is a drum roll going on here but you can not hear it, lol. Kimmie is beating in a pot with a metal spoon.)

Daisy, Maisy and then there was not another *aisy

Now for the truth about the vote. The  Official Mayonnaise Jar that was holding the votes was hidden under a palm tree in my yard. During the heavy rains and wind that palm tree was uprooted crushing the jar and rendering the votes unreadable. Kiddies you have to know that I was devastated. All this work, done so scientifically, ruined by Mother Nature. I was distraught.

So my choices were few. 1. I could run the voting over again; but truthfully I wanted to put an end to this silliness. 2. I could put the names on pieces of meat and see which one my dog ate first; but I could tell that she wanted no part of this process. 3. I could let this cute little four year old girl pick the winner.

I chose #3. For one simple reason. When Kimmie looks at me with those big blue saucer eyes I melt. So pick she did. Her reasoning for the choice; her favorite name was *aisy. The mind of a child. How could we go wrong.

In other business; with the Royal Wedding concluded, a giant hole has been left in our collective Royal/Celebrity watching mania. So I am proposing a union of two people that would make a wonderful couple and put at least two of Hollywood's Nuts in one basket.

I propose the union of:




Charlie Sheen~~~shown here protecting his brain from transmission from space that are telling him to act like an ass.

To:


Charlene Sheen~~seen here posing for the magazine Transgender Monthly. And looking ravishing I might add.

Now if they want to hold the wedding here in the USA, which seems to be mired in the argument as to what makes up a legal union between two people, man/woman, woman/woman, man/man, fury/human, I have an alternate mate for Mr Sheen.


The beautiful and quite insane Lindsay Lohan~~seen here resting after a hard night of drinking, drug taking and stealing from jewelry stores.

Either way Charlie goes here~~~WINNING!

I so want an invite to this one, lol.

Love ya,
Night

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