I Am Jealous Of My Avatar

I am like a broken car. My tires are all flat, all my windows have been shot out and I have an old vagrant living inside me. My Second Life avatar is like a well oiled, high efficiency and good looking machine with a vibrant soul and boundless energy. So yes I am jealous of him.

I have been going to the doctor lately for my 10 billion mile checkup and so far I have avoided being consigned to a junkyard and sold for parts. Last week I had a Nuclear Stress Test. Y'all know the one, lol, They filled me with radioactive material, not enough to make me glow but enough to make me sick, and then took pictures of my heart after being tortured on a treadmill at a speed I have not walked in 50 years.  There is no place that I need to get to that quickly.

 When the doctor called with my results I was told that "Your heart is not perfect but it's not bad". I could have told him that without the test. I have also had an echo-cardiogram, blood work and shots to prevent pneumonia and shingles. They also want a doctor to take a tour of my ass with a camera, colonoscopy. I am sure that will be fun. I wonder if the pictures will be for sale like those at amusement parks. I am sure my face will look the same as those people screaming as the camera goes off.

When all is said and done, I guess I am not doing that bad. My extended warranty has not run out, my oil and filters are getting changed regularly and my engine, while it no longer purrs like a kitten or roars like a lion, still cranks up every morning thanks to pills and supplements.

I am generally happy. I do not live my real life vicariously. Z provides me the lifestyle that I lived many years ago. The best thing is~~Z Never Gets Tired.

Love You All
Randy

What Is That Noise?

What is that extremely loud sound echoing across the United States? It seems to get louder every day and at times the ground seems to shake. That sound is the Greatest Generation rolling over in their graves in response to the state of our beloved country.

I can imagine them asking themselves, "How could our efforts to save this country from enemies without end in losing it to enemies within?"

I have no simple answer to give them. There is no single person or group to lay the blame on for our condition.

This country has a cancer, Political Cancer', that has invaded every facet of our lives. There are no new drugs or advanced cancer centers that can combat this disease because we seem no longer to have the will to fight it.

Our government has given us warning labels for cigarettes, alcohol and drugs when what we really need is a warning label stuck to the ass' of those elected to serve in Washington, DC, "WARNING~POLITICS MAKES THIS PERSON SELF ABSORBED, SELF RIGHTEOUS AND SELF IMPORTANT".

We  have been witness to the death of common sense and personal responsibility. We have watched the bastardization of  'The Rule Of Law'. We live in country where those who illegally immigrate are pushed to the front of the line with amnesty over those who choose to immigrate within the law.

We raised a generation that  needs 'safe spaces' so they can avoid discourse with those who hold different views because they live in fear of  having their feelings hurt. By the way, there are no safe spaces in the real world.

We elected a black president and racism seems to be worse than before his election. Was racism bubbling under the surface and we just didn't notice? Are we talking about it more because the news media is reporting on it more?

We are on the verge of possibly electing our first female president. Does that mean that we will follow suit and have sexism increase as racism increased under a black president?

We have witnessed the self destruction and demise of the Republican Party over support or non support of their own candidate. A case of the political elite snubbing and not listening to its own party members.

We are losing 'the war on poverty', 'the war on drugs' and 'the war on runaway government spending'.

Bipartisanship is a concept bandied about in public and laughed at in the halls of congress.

All these things are results of the political cancer that is running rampant throughout the country. Those we have elected to deal with this cancer do not seem to have the will or skill to solve with the problems.

The Greatest Generation has to be so disappointed!!!

VOTE!! It is the only cure for this disease.

Randy

What He Is Doing Is Not Easy!!

I wholeheartedly agree with Colin Kaepernick's right to protest in his chosen manner. I do not agree with his chosen vehicle to convey his feelings and it is one that I would never employ. Oppression, of any kind, is reprehensible and needs to be addressed in an open and honest discussion among all Americans.

The root of oppression, in The United States, I believe, is firmly planted in poverty. Our government has fostered an atmosphere of 'Economic Oppression' for decades producing  desperation and distrust among our people.

While race has been pushed to the forefront; American oppression runs much deeper than the color of our skin or how we worship God.  It has become interwoven into the fabric of our everyday lives. It did not happen overnight. It was a gradual  process that pitted our political system against our citizens.

In truth; this is our own fault. We continually elected people to represent us that in many cases represented their own interest over that of the people. Time and time again we sent  people to Washington, DC who we knew, in our hearts, were not there for us.

We allowed a few hundred people to lounge safely inside the beltway and dictate what The United States should become.

Americans were, and still are, held in poverty, by government programs that discourage ambition and encourage crime. Working to attain the "American Dream' was replaced  by 'legislative attempts' at achieving it.

It will take many lifetimes to instill a sense of  responsibility back into our everyday lives, to replace political correctness with common sense and decency and to eliminate the sense of hopelessness that eats away at our very existence.

We need to elect individuals that will put our country first and move us toward values that make sense for all Americans.

I hate what Colin Kaepernick is doing but I encourage him to continue doing it.

I encourage you to vote. We are in the midst of a nightmare presidential election cycle and I believe that there is no winning for us, no matter who we choose, but complacency in expressing our constitutional voting rights is a grave mistake.

Continue to dream, continue to hope and respect each other. We do not need government to do those simple things.

Randy

The Snow Rapture

It seems that every storm, of significant size, is now given a name, by what passes for news reporters, to help sensationalize it for public consumption.  The Storm of the Century, Snowmageddon and Snowapocolypse are tossed around freely like they are terms we need to embrace blindly and with brain cell loss enthusiasm. My Second Life partner is calling it Snow San Andreas  Fault.

I am calling it The Snow Rapture. Not because I believe that people will disappear but rather because commodities disappear at a brisk pace.  Although some fools will get in their cars and head off to do donuts in the Walmart parking lot and never be seen or heard from again.

Yesterday I witnessed the rapture of bread, milk, generators, snow shovels, deicing agents  and other essentials required to survive a snow storm. There were reports of beer, wine and liquor being  raptured (yes I made the word rapture a verb)  from stores located in the path of this God send of a storm.

My only explanation for this alcohol rapture phenomenon  is that people think they will be snowed in for months forcing them to eat their neighbors to survive after their supplies run out. The Donner Party cook book does state that alcohol is a human tenderizer and that alcohol is the perfect  beverage to wash down Homo Sapiens steaks and ribs. Thankfully I do not know my neighbors. There are a few tasty  morsels, that walk by the house in the evening, but that is a subject for another day.

So here I sit waiting for 3 pm, because that is the start time the weather people have given us. We have bread, milk, coffee, soup, many varsities of snacks, snow shovels, deicing agents and a list of television shows we want to catch up on.

We have no alcohol as we do not drink. I guess we will have to devour our neighbors untenderized  and suffer through a rough chew.

If we survive the Snow Rapture life will return to normal in no time. I hope.

Wouldn't this be a perfect time for someone to start The Zombie Apocalypse?

Randy.



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Shopping For Great Electronics During A Riot

As the saying goes, "Never let a good riot opportunity go to waste". That seems to be the mantra of many of the people who have participated in riots throughout the past year. I understand the frustration of people in places like Ferguson, Missouri,  Baltimore, Maryland and many other places that have seen injustice year after year.

Inequality, whether racial, financial or any other reason, is unacceptable. Civil disobedience is the result of such injustice. Many people who participated in the riots were not there to protest injustice but rather to take advantage of a terrible situation for their gain.

I totally support anyone's right to protest in a peaceable manner. I understand that tempers fly and discussions get heated but at no time is it alright to break into anyone's business and steal from it. at no time is is alright to burn a business, house or any other property because you are upset. Especially in your own neighborhood. Tearing down the place you live, no matter what the conditions, is just plain stupid.

I never get upset if people protest. In fact I encourage it when injustice is uncovered. Remember, this country was founded on civil disobedience against an unjust government. Standing up to injustice is in our blood, our psyche.

Please shine a bright light on any injustice. Push that injustice into the light of day for all to see. But please do not let that light emanate from a stolen television or a fire at the local drug store.

Randy

Ode To Humanity

Political Correctness parading as Humanity is one of the major faux pas of our time. We have reached a point where we care more about someone's feelings than we do about doing the correct thing.

In reality no matter what we say or do someone may be upset. These days living our lives is a crap shoot of walking on the egg shells of Political Correctness. Things that seem right have suddenly been turned upside down and called wrong or hurtful to others.

I guess I should not say 'suddenly' as this process has been building for decades. Starting in the 60's, of our last century, we seem to have lost a sense of good and evil, of funny and hurtful.

We do not allow God in schools because it may upset some atheists but care little about upsetting the religious community. We can not call the terrorists,  that live their lives to kill us, Islamic terrorists because it might make them angry at us. GUESS WHAT? They already are and no amount of Political Correctness will change that fact.

We no longer can say Merry Christmas and have to substitute Happy Holiday in its place. That even pisses me off and I am not a Christian. I believe that, given enough time and idiocy, December 25th will become a day of families eating together while on Skype so they can see each other from their receptive homes. God forbid we actually interact with each other in an in person manner.

Sorry; that should have been 'Some Higher Power Who Is Not God. Maybe Just A Super Hero Like Superman' Forbid. WHEW!! That will get the Political Correctness Police off my back, lol.

We judge people and things, from centuries past, on the basis of how our society thinks today. Columbus was evil because he acted like a man living in his time. The Confederate flag is evil because once it represented the south in the Civil War. Some people are expunging ancestors from their family histories because they did things that were normal in their lifetimes but Politically Incorrect now.

What is lost here is the 'Rule Of Common Sense'. I see comedians do foul mouthed shows where if they were deprived of the use of the work 'FUCK' they could not do there act. And yet this seems to be Politically Correct. But let a white comedian use the word 'Nigger' and the Political Correctness Police are crucifying them with the handle 'Racist'.

We need to think about what being Political Correct has done to our society. Political Correctness is a far worse export, from our shores, than tobacco and fast food. Political Correctness can be a cancer within itself eating away at the fabric of our society, until we lose our individuality and we all start dressing in matching gray outfits and walking arm and arm to the tunes of Political Correct Solidarity.

I crave the days when I could tell a joke about 'The Taint, The Grundle, The Fleshy Fun Bridge' and not have a million emails telling me that in one joke I have insulted women, men, gays, laws against sodomy, the Christian right, the liberal left and The Holy Bible Itself.

Randy

Saving The World With Healthy Daily Pooping

Any discussion of poop raises the lid on a plethora of jokes and innuendos.  But lets look at the benefits of 'healthy daily bowel movements' beyond those achieved by the individual sitting upon his or her porcelain thrown.

Have you ever looked at an individual whose outlook on life would benefit from a good healthy poop?  I believe that Vladimir Putin is one such individual. Come to think of it, most politicians seem to be suffering from impacted bowels.

There have been people who have tried to deal with human poop in a practical manner. Pierre Leroux, an 18th century economist, believed that disposing of human feces was a waste of a 'natural resource'. He developed the Circulus Theory which may be the source of the old saying, "What goes around~comes around".  His saw that animal feces could be used as a fertilizer so it stood reason that human feces could be used as a fertilizer. This, according to Leroux, would double the food production, save and use a natural resource and end hunger.

Victor Hugo supported this theory, in Les Miserables, when he pointed out the sewer as "gold flowing from full hands" and makes a defense of Circulus Theory.

To say the least; most people found Leroux's plan unpalatable.

The first question that should be asked, of any presidential candidate, is whether they had pooped that day. That information would go a long way to explaining their stand on some of the issues.

Those conducting war should not be allowed to make decisions that put our military in harms way if the are constipated. Believe me, when I say that war is a shitty situation anyway and that a good healthy bowel movement, from the commanding general, will keep out troops out of the deep shit that a clouded mind and full bowel afford.

Every person, who holds a position of power, should wear a pin with the following on it.

Then we would know for sure if they are in a position to make clear decisions.

Remember that nothing makes life more livable than a good meal, a good nights sleep and a morning bowel movement that puts life in prospective.

Randy

P.S. ~Part of this blog was taken from a story written by Esther Inglis-Arkell, tittled 'How One Man Wanted To Save The World By Taxing Poop".